We’ve all been in those situations in China when someone does something incredibly rude to you but you have nothing to say because your Chinese just isn’t good enough.  There’s a million things you wish you could say to that person that is rude to you, but you have no idea how to express your true anger using the Chinese language.  Now the Chinese slang blog gives you all the ammunition you will ever need to fight back and be just as rude in return.  If you’re walking on the subway and some guy just bumps into your for no reason, then you can proceed to say “Are you blind! Watch out where you’re going!” Having the perfect response to every situation will make you feel so much better about yourself.  

你怎么那么坏！-nǐ zěn me nà me huài-How could you be so awful!

那全都是你的错，你怎么那么坏！

nà quán dōu shì nǐde cuò，nǐ zěnme nàme huài！

That was completely wrong of you. How could you be so awful!

你不是人-nǐ bú shì rén-You are not human (Verb)

这是我听过的最糟糕的事情，你真不是人。

zhè shì wǒ tīngguò de zuì zāogāo de shìqíng，nǐ zhēn búshì rén。

That is the worst thing I have ever heard. You are not even human.

你不是东西-nǐ bú shì dōng xī-You’re a nobody (Verb)

Literal Translation-You are not thing

你以为你是谁？ 你根本就不是东西！

nǐ yǐwéi nǐ shì shuí？nǐ gēnběn jiù búshì dōngxi！

Who do you think you are? You’re a nobody!

你以为你是谁-nǐ yǐ wéi nǐ shì shuí-Who do you think you are？

你以为你是谁？ 那可是我的女朋友！

nǐ yǐwéi nǐ shì shuí？nà kě shì wǒde nǚpéngyǒu！

Who do you think you are? That’s my girlfriend！

有屁快放-yǒu pì kuài fang-If you have something to say, hurry up and say it (Verb)

Literal Translation-If you need to fart, hurry up and fart

有屁快放，我不想再听你的废话了。

yǒu pì kuài fàng，wǒ bùxiǎng zài tīng nǐde fèihuà le。

I’m tired of listening to your crap, spit it out already.

老不死的-lǎo bù sǐ de-You’re so old, why don’t you just die! (Adj)

Literal Translation-Old not dead

闭嘴！ 你这个老不死的！

bìzuǐ！nǐ zhègè lǎobùsǐde！

Shut up old man! You’re so old, why don’t you just die!

该死的-gāi sǐ de-You should die (Adj)

Literal Translation-should die

你这个该死的，居然那样对待那个可怜的孩子。

nǐ zhègè gāisǐde，jūrán nàyàng duìdài nàgè kělián de háizi。

You should die for what you did to that poor child.

你找死-nǐ zhǎo sǐ-Do you have a death wish?

Literal Translation-You find death

你疯了？ 你找死吗？

nǐ fēngle？nǐ zhǎosǐ ma？

Are you crazy? Do you have a death wish?

泼妇-pō fù-Terrible woman (Noun)

Literal Translation-Spill woman

那个泼妇毁掉了她所遇到的每个男人的生活。

nàgè pōfù huǐdiào le tā suǒ yùdào de měi gè nánrén de shēnghuó。

That terrible woman ruins the life of every man she meets.

不要脸-bú yào liǎn-Shameless (Adj)

Literal Translation-Don’t want face

我的老板在工人的工资上作弊，真是不要脸。

wǒde lǎobǎn zài gōngrén de gōngzī shàng zuòbì，zhēn shì búyàoliǎn。

My boss is shameless for cheating his workers from their salaries.

无赖-wú lài-Scoundrel, scumbag (Noun)

Literal Translation-No rely

那个无赖无论承担什么责任都不会有人信任他。

nàgè wúlài wúlùn chéngdān shénme zérèn dōu bú huì yǒu rén xìnrèn tā。

That scumbag can’t be trusted with any responsibilities.

浑球儿-hún qiúr-Scum bag, rascal, jerk (Noun)

Literal Translation-Muddy ball

我的前男友是个混球，所以别信他说的任何一个字。

wǒde qiánnányǒu shì gè hùnqiúr，suǒyǐ bié xìn tā shuō de rènhé yí gè zì。

My ex-boyfriend is a scumbag so you shouldn’t listen to a word he says.

去死-qù sǐ-Go to the hell (Verb)

Literal Translation-Go die

去死！窝囊废！

qùsǐ！wōnángfèi！

Go to hell loser!

滚-gǔn-Go Away! Buzz Off! (Verb)

Literal Translation-Roll

滚，我不想听你的废话了。

gǔn，wǒ bùxiǎng tīng nǐ de fèihuà le。

Buzz off! I’m tired of listenting to your crap!

去-qù-Shut up! (Interj)

Literal Translation-Go

去！我不想再听了！

qù！wǒ bùxiǎng zài tīng le！

Shut up! I can’t stand to listen to it anymore!

去你的！-qù nǐ de-Get lost! Stop it! Up yours! (Interj)

Literal Translation-Go yours

去你的!你说的都是屁话。

qù nǐ de! nǐ shuōde dōu shì pìhuà。

Up yours! What you are saying is nonsense

太过分了-tài guò fèn le-Go too far, over the top (Adj)

Literal Translation-Too over point

一点也不好笑，你玩的太过分了。

yìdiǎn yě bù hǎoxiào，nǐ wán de tài guòfèn le。

It’s not funny anymore. You have gone too far with your teasing.

你吃错药了吗？-nǐ chī cuò yào le ma？-Did you take the wrong medicine?

你究竟在想什么？ 你吃错药了吗？

nǐ jiūjìng zài xiǎng shénme？nǐ chī cuò yào le ma？

What the hell were you thinking? Did you take the wrong medicine?

哑了啊？-yǎ le a-Are you mute?

为什么不回答我的问题？ 你哑了啊？

wèishénme bù huídá wǒ de wèntí？nǐ yǎ le a？

I just asked you a question and you didn’t answer. Are you mute?

你瞎呀？-nǐ xiā ya？-Are you blind?

没看见我在排队吗？ 你瞎啊？

méi kànjiàn wǒ zài páiduì ma？nǐ xiā a？

Don’t you see me waiting in line? Are you blind?

废人-fèi rén-Useless person，disabled (Noun)

Literal Translation-Wasted person

我男朋友是个十足的废人，他连门都修不好。

wǒ nánpéngyǒu shì gè shízú de fèirén，tā lián mén dōu xiū bù hǎo。

My boyfriend is completely useless! He can’t even fix the door.

烦-fán-Annoying, troublesome，irritating. (Adj)

那个女孩怎么这么烦？

nàgè nǚhái zěnme zhème fán？

Why is that girl so annoying?

骗子-piàn zi-Liar, Cheater (Noun)

那个人是骗子，别听他说的。

nàgè rén shì piànzi，bié tīng tā shuō de。

That man is liar, don’t listen to what he says.

混蛋-hùn dàn-Jerk, scumbag, (Noun)

Literal Translation-Mix egg

混蛋，你毁了我的车！

hùndàn，nǐ huǐ le wǒde chē！

You ruined my car you jerk!

闭嘴！-bì zuǐ-Shut up! (Verb)

Literal Translation-Shut mouth

在我揍你之前你最好闭嘴！

zài wǒ zòu nǐ zhīqián nǐ zuìhǎo bìzuǐ！

You better shut up before I beat you!

恶心-ě xīn-Disgusting, gross (Adj)

Literal Translation-Evil heart

天哪！那是我见过最恶心的事情。

tiān na！nà shì wǒ jiànguò zuì ěxīn de shìqíng。

Oh my God! That is the most disgusting thing I’ve ever seen.

抬杠-tái gang-Deliberately starting an argument (Verb)

Literal Translation-Lift tube

我女朋友总是抬杠，好像她很想跟我打一架。

wǒ nǚpéngyǒu zǒngshì táigàng，hǎoxiàng tā hěn xiǎng gēn wǒ dǎ yí jià。

My girlfriend is always deliberately starting arguments. It’ seems like she wants to fight with me.

撒谎-sā huǎng-Tell a lie (Verb)

Literal Translation-Spill lie

她对我撒谎了，她说她18岁。

tā duì wǒ sāhuǎng le，tā shuō tā 18 suì。

She was telling me a lie when she said she was eighteen years old.